Amidst the Shaded Trees
by steepedinshadows419
Summary: Pre-Series - There was a time when Ryder & Jade didn't have to hide their love and then there was the moment it all ended. A series of moments between Ryder & Jade before and shortly after Quinn proposed to her. Ryder/Jade.
1. Part 1

A/N: Some more RyJa. I think this'll be a 2-3 parter (maybe more). In the show, Quinn seemed to imply that Ryder and Jade used to be together when they were much younger, but when you see them together in private, it doesn't seem like they were ever apart. So, what if they were sneaking around long before she became engaged to Quinn? Here are some snapshots of during that time.

*I own nothing. No copyright infringement intended. If it was up to me, these two would've had way more scenes and it would be easier for me to make videos.

…

He watched her from his position leaning against the house as he always did. He knew it was tough work – picking poppies – but she was a beauty when she did it. Her hair sticking to her face and sweat gathering at her temple didn't detract from that. Because when she finally looked at him, when she caught him staring at her, as he always made sure she did, a smile spread across her face and her eyes sparkled and she ran to him when she was sure no one was watching. And he gathered her into his arms and kissed her and they ran off for a few hours to a place beyond poppies and clippers and colts to an orchard bordering the woods on the far end of the property. They chased each other and he grabbed for any apple she wanted and they ate together in the shade of the trees and it was perfect.

Today was no different, except for the fact that she still hadn't looked up at him. He wasn't that far off, so it puzzled him that she couldn't sense his presence. The possibility that she did and just refused to acknowledge him caused a turning in his stomach that ate at him and was all too familiar.

Because today _was_ different, even if he didn't want to admit it.

Because two weeks ago today, his father had grown ill with fever and stayed shut off in his room. The only people allowed in were his mother, Lydia, and any manner of cooks and maids inside the house to deliver food and herbs and drink to quell his sickness.

In a few days he had healed and everything resumed as it had before the incident.

But not Jade.

She mentioned offhandedly that it was she who had delivered the soap to his chambers. She had expected only to do it once because her main duty had always been picking poppies. But on that first occasion, Quinn had seemed so taken by her that he insisted she be the one to deliver whatever he needed as long as he needed it while he was ill.

Ryder hardly saw her those few days.

Afterwards, she had seemed a little shaken whenever his father's name was mentioned. And whenever she saw him – Ryder – she was always initially wary. His natural charm and complete devotion to her inevitably brought her out of her shell and made her forget these new burdens, but there was no more running out to the orchard. Quinn had taken to her so much that he resigned her to the kitchens with only a small part of her work day being designated to the poppy fields.

"Jade!"

Finally, she looked up, but not towards him for he had not called to her. Someone else. A worker maybe, or another cog. At any rate, she got up without looking towards him, took her basket of poppy shavings with her and headed towards whoever had called to her.

Frowning, Ryder's eyes followed to where she went – straight into the house. His face paled then because he knew she had been summoned by his father and the twisting in his gut intensified.

…

After a week of being more or less ignored by Jade, Ryder decided he'd had enough. Mid-morning as she was headed out to the field, he snagged his arm around her waist and pulled her up against him. He put a finger against her lips, so she wouldn't speak and then pulled her along to a distance. Not as far as the orchard, but far enough for no one to hear, behind some tall bushes.

"What is going on, Ryder?" she gasped when they finally stop. "I have to get to work. I can't—"

"You've been avoiding me," he cut her off. "Tell me why."

"I haven't been avoiding you," she said, avoiding eye contact. "I've just been busy. I'm working both in and out of the house now. I can't—"

"By my father? Did Quinn change when and where you work?" he demanded.

She kept her eyes down and swallowed. "You know I cannot defy anything he does, Ryder. If he decides he wants me to work in the house…"

"Where he is," Ryder muttered under his breath.

Jade's brows furrowed and she looked up at him finally. "Of course. What other reason would there be for me to be there?"

He looked at her in disbelief that she hadn't connected the dots.

"There isn't, Jade. Don't you get it? He wants you near him."

"But for what…" The question went unfinished as the revelation dawned on her. "No. He wouldn't. He's been taking a fancy to Beatriz, and I'm much too young."

"Maybe, but if you haven't suspected that he's considering you, why have you been avoiding me?"

"I think I'm allowed to some private time."

"I thought you private time was with me," he said stubbornly, and then swooped in for a kiss, cutting off whatever it was she had planned to say, but eventually she pulled away.

"Ryder…" she swallowed.

"Or maybe it was just stolen moments."

He looked so dejected, so hurt, that Jade pushed aside her fears, pulled him close and kissed him. She let herself get lost in it, because as long as they were hidden, she was safe to do as she liked.

She would break the news to him later that Quinn had warned her against fraternizing with his son.


	2. Part 2

A/N: This chap is a little more PG-13.

*I own nothing. No copyright infringement intended.

 **…**

She came to him beneath the shaded trees they'd played under since there were children. He tried to ignore how her dress was a little nicer, her hands a little softer, her hair not partially stuck to her face. He knew there was a reason behind it, but he was very good at ignoring what he didn't particularly like, so he focused instead on her eyes that never changed, that were always crystalline and beautiful. Eyes that adored him.

She smiled when he reached for her, smiled so wide she almost laughed. Her eyes sparkled and dimples reached into the sides of her cheeks. And then he kissed her and she lost herself in that kiss, in the feel of his hand around the back of her neck and his fingers slipping into her honey tresses.

"I missed you," she murmured, still smiling. She felt him smile against her too and it made her smile more.

"I just saw you this morning," he said, kissing her neck, and then nuzzling her.

She felt chills race down her spine and pulled him closer to her, her arms around his neck, as he lay cradled against the base of a tree.

"Too long ago," she gasped.

His lips and then his tongue and then his teeth made a trail along the collarbone he was slowly uncovering.

" _Ryder_." Her nails dug into his neck.

He felt her shiver and took glorious pleasure in it.

"What excuse did you give?" he asked, moving to her opposite shoulder and unraveling the button down blouse that now hung loosely around her frame.

"Hmm?" she murmured, half gone already with his ministrations.

"I said…" He let his hand drift down her side until it squeezed her hip gently. "What excuse did you give?" he whispered in her ear, his teeth lightly scraping the outer shell.

"I…I…"

He stopped, pulled back and looked at her. Finally she opened her eyes when she realized he wouldn't go further without an answer.

"Yes?" he prompted.

"I…" Her brows furrowed. "Does it matter?"

And then suddenly it _did_ matter. Not because he particularly cared what the excuse she'd given was, but because of how she asked and how he couldn't tell if it was defensive because she didn't want to tell him or because she was so aroused by him she couldn't remember.

So, he said nothing and he knew she could tell he needed to know because he didn't start kissing her again, didn't start doing anything again. That was also how she knew he wasn't angry enough that he wanted her to leave. He never wanted her to leave. That's what made it hurt so much.

" _Ryder_ ," she said softly, and she avoided his eyes.

He didn't want to know now. He knew for sure he didn't want to know. And he knew that she knew that because she knew him so well. She knew that if he didn't like something, he ignored it until it was absolutely impossible to avoid dealing with it any longer. And there must still be time left if she wasn't outright telling him, because he knew she would if there wasn't any.

Because she knew him.

"Does it have to do with my father?"

He swallowed hard and then he couldn't look at her. Several moments passed and he seriously considered releasing her. But then he thought of his empty bed sheets and no one to talk to except his mother, and no one who would take him seriously, and how alone he always felt when she wasn't right there next to him.

"You don't…" she began cautiously.

"You're right," he said, "I don't."

Then he gently pushed her off his lap and let her go, all except for one hand. Her frown of disappointment turned into furrowed brows of confusion when he pulled her to her feet. Her eyes questioned him, queried his name in silence.

"I don't want to know," he said. "You're a terrible liar," he managed to laugh a little. "And I don't want to know the truth."

"The truth isn't so bad…" she said, drawing lines along his jaw with her finger. "It's probably worse in your mind."

"Maybe," he allowed. "But all I care about right now is that you're here with me."

"I am, Ryder. I'm here."

With her eyes glued to him like they were, he knew she was speaking the truth. It didn't matter that the excuse she'd used might be awful or might not be so bad, that the insinuation were worse than the reality, which was likely the case.

It didn't matter that they should be allowed to be together openly, but because Quinn had given Jade strict instructions not to be with his son, they technically couldn't be seen together except in the most unavoidable capacity.

It didn't matter that it was getting harder to ignore the way Ryder's father looked at Jade, even though Beatrice had only been gone for six months, and Lydia was more on edge than ever.

None of that mattered.

What mattered was that they were together, and whatever hindered them being so was out of sight.

So, he pulled her along to a tree further back on the property and turned her so she was pushed against the back of the tree and he kissed her until she could no longer think clearly, let alone remember the excuse she'd used to get away from the house or make one up.

Because the truth was she'd made no excuse. She'd fulfilled all her duties for the day and she'd discreetly left the house. When another cog approached her, she said she was going out to fetch apples for the baron and baroness. There was a knowing look in the girl's eyes, but she never said a word to contradict her. She even turned the other way when Jade went to continue out the door.

Both of those things Jade _knew_ would upset Ryder. Both caused suspicion. Both were risky. And at least one of them indicated that someone might find them.

It was nothing revolting or offensive like Ryder was probably thinking, and so she thought it best to distract him. It might eat at him later that night when he was trying to sleep and unable to, just as would be the case with her, but in this moment the feel of his lips, the touch of his hands, the sweet murmurs in her ear were her undoing. When she pushed herself up against him, let him feel her curves and her scent and her need, she knew the effect was mutual and always had been.

"Ryder-Ryder," she finally pulled away. She cupped his face but kept it at a short distance, forcing him to look at her, to listen to something other than her gasps and moans of pleasure.

He blinked.

"What?" he asked, and then a perverse smirk formed on his features. "Did you want to…"

In other circumstances she would've playfully slapped him, but in her current position the best she could manage was rolling her eyes, which ended in a coy smile on her face. An agreement. A _yes_. Because _of course_ she wanted to. She _always_ wanted to. And he loved that about her.

Her sigh told him _not yet_ though, so he tried unsuccessfully to wipe the dirty smirk off his face.

"Then what?"

When she looked up at him, playfulness replacing the smile, she was glad that his expression didn't immediately turn to panic.

"I need you to know that I love you, Ryder."

His face paled and he swallowed. He was clearly starting to fear the worst, the end of them, but there was also love and insurmountable amount of affection in his eyes that warmed her insides.

"No matter what happens." Her fingers clutched the collar of his shirt. "I will always love you. I will always want you. Nothing can change that."

She saw the fear in his eyes very clearly now, the _do you know something terrible you're not telling me_ , the _is the worst case scenario in my mind actually a reality now_? But she confirmed nothing, because even she didn't have a solid answer. Just intuition. Terrible intuition she worried predicted the future.

Ryder didn't ask any of the things his eyes were begging to have answered, as she knew he wouldn't.

Instead, he kissed her, kissed her lips and cheek and along her jaw line. And he whispered into her ear sweet nothings she would always cling to even in the coming days and years ahead.

When he pulled back there was a sad smile on his face.

"My mother has never stopped loving my father," he said, "And while I know he still cares for her, it's not as it used to be." He avoided her gaze for a moment, and she knew why. "I don't think it ever will be again." He sighed, and then leaned into her hand when she held it against his cheek.

"Ryder…" she beckoned softly.

He turned to her, drawn as always by the sweet melody of her voice.

"I want to be a Baron someday," he told her. "My father doesn't think I can do it, but I know I can." He paused, his gaze growing more intense, driving into hers, and she let herself drown in it. "I can promise you though that is the _only_ thing we will have in common, because I will love you forever and I will _never_ want another. As long as you're mine, I am yours."

Tears in her eyes, she nodded, and whispered, "I'm yours, Ryder. I'm yours."

And then they lost themselves to each other, kissing fiercely against the back of that tree trunk. When the sun began to set, Ryder lowered Jade to the ground and made love to her amidst the shaded trees.


	3. Part 3

**A/N:** One more chap after this. Not sure when it'll be posted. I hope you enjoy this one in the meantime! :)

 ***** HUGE thanks to my lovely beta, **sendtherain,** for not only looking this over but also contributing one of my fav lines in this chap. BEST.

 ***** I own nothing. No copyright infringement intended.

...

The first time he walked into her new room, she was standing before the vanity, eyes dull, lips faintly quivering, and skin pale as ice. But all Ryder felt was a building anger.

"Quite the upgrade."

Jade's gaze found his in the mirror, and she gasped.

" _Ryder_." She spun around, eyes wide, and found herself rendered speechless.

He stared at her in disbelief. In all the years he'd known her - even in the last near decade where their interactions had become more secretive, less easy to come by - he'd never thought she'd end up here. In the bedroom of the next wife of Quinn, Armadillo Baron of the Badlands.

He'd absolutely _refused_ to believe it.

But he was that way about a lot of things he didn't like to hear or accept. Practically everything.

"You have to understand—"

"Save it, Jade," he scoffed and turned away from her, oblivious to the tear rolling down her cheek. "Or should I call you…Mom?"

" _Don't_."

The hitch in her voice made him turn to face her, weakened him a little. Because he saw the tears streaming down her cheeks. She was hurting. _He_ was hurting her. And he'd never in his life wanted to hurt her until he saw her seated beside his father at the breakfast table as Quinn announced she was to be his new bride.

She took a breath and approached him now. He didn't back up. His eyes were glued to hers, his body tense as she reached for him and then retreated just before their skin made contact.

"You know I had no choice, Ryder." Her voice hitched again. "You know if Quinn says he wants something, he gets it, and anyone who tries to say otherwise is damned. I would've been banished. I would've had nowhere else to go." She paused, telling herself to breathe, to get a hold of herself, to stop crying for one _second_. "I would've never seen you again."

Ryder closed his eyes briefly, letting her words wash over him. Especially that last part. She ached for him just as deeply, as passionately as he ached for her. It didn't soothe his anger. If anything, it only intensified it. But he knew now he was directing it at the wrong person.

"Were you even going to tell me?" he whispered, trying to make his voice soft but coming out rough and demanding instead.

She swallowed hard, and this time her wandering, hesitant hand did grasp his. Relieved that he didn't instantly yank himself free, Jade took another step closer and took his other hand in her other too. Then, without looking at him, she brought their hands to her face and rested one cheek upon his.

The vulnerability in her overwhelmed him and he found himself pulling her close, wrapping his arms around her and feeling the swell in his chest when she nuzzled into the rich fabric of his shirt.

"You told me not to tell you anything that had to do with me and your father," she replied with the voice of an angel. "I was honoring your wishes, Ryder." She paused and licked her lips. "Besides, you would've silenced me before I had a chance to really say anything, and you know it."

She was right. He did know it. He had only himself to blame for not knowing sooner. He and his refusal to acknowledge the nightmare unfolding before him had sufficiently kept him in the dark, completely blindsiding him when the truth was forced upon him right there at the breakfast table.

"Silenced you with kisses," he corrected, to which Jade lifted her head and matched the suggestive smirk now present on his face.

"That is your specialty," she said, her eyes dropping to his lips.

He groaned. " _Jade_."

Then his lips descended on hers and their current predicament was lost to the warm sensuality they wrapped around each other. Soon after though, footsteps sounded down the hallway. They probably just belonged to a cog, but the uncertainty of it was enough to make Jade tense up and break apart from Ryder and his tantalizing kisses.

"What is it?" he complained, his voice a notch louder than Jade would've wished. She placed two fingers on his lips, ignoring when he kissed them, and turned her head towards the door to try and hear if the footsteps were slowing as they neared her room or maintaining their pace further down the hall.

They continued, but she was wary now of everything.

"What?" he asked, softer this time. He searched her eyes when she looked back at him, worry and vulnerability coloring them. She was the only one who could pull that emotion from him, and she hardly even tried. "Are you embarrassed to be seen with me?" he asked, starting to detach from her.

"No." He tried to untangle himself from her, but she tightened her grip on him. "No," she insisted. He sighed. " _Not_ embarrassed, Ryder." She swallowed hard. "I'm scared. For both of us."

He shook his head, brushing his fingers along the graceful line of her neck, about to reassure her before she continued with words he'd been dreading since the night Quinn had fallen ill and Jade had tended to him.

"I think we should stop seeing each other."

His eyes narrowed, and he dropped his hands from her. She let him.

"This was your plan all along, wasn't it? To rise in station? To marry my father? To leave me in the dust?"

"Ryder, how can you say that? I love you."

He scoffed.

"I never wanted this. I didn't ask for this."

"So, you'd rather be in the fields, working all day until your hands blister? Instead of living in luxury with the silk cloth on your skin and cogs – which is what you used to be – waiting on you for your every desire?"

"I would rather live as _your_ wife, but I was not given that choice."

He tensed, wanting to be angry, but it was hard to do with her. He didn't have the courage to confront his father about this, so he couldn't direct his anger at the correct person. It wouldn't matter though. Quinn would laugh in his face.

She closed the distance between them again, took his hands, kissed each finger reverently, and sighed.

"You kiss my hands until they don't hurt anymore. You bandage them when they're bleeding." She looked up at him with tears in her eyes. "You don't do that with anyone else. You don't lift a finger to help a single soul, but you do it with me. I don't think it's out of pity."

He caved, crumbling in front of her, pain and adoration seeping out of his eyes as he looked down at her.

"Because I love you, Jade," he rasped. "Ever since we were children and you snuck into my room at night to give me the bread I'd been refused at dinner just because my father wanted to see how strong I was, how long I could endure without food. Even my mother couldn't dissuade him from starving her own son."

"You were my friend, and you were eight years old. I couldn't let you starve." She smiled softly, and he returned the gesture. "But there's something I didn't tell you about that night."

His brows furrowed.

"I saw your mom in the hall after I left. She had brought you food too."

"The piece of bread under my pillow the next morning," he recalled.

She nodded and smiled.

"I took credit for it because you gave it to me the next time we played, but it wasn't me."

He shook his head. "Always trying to take advantage of the situation and get the higher ground."

She half-laughed, but his smile faded and hers did too. Wasn't she 'taking advantage' of the situation now? _No_ , she very honestly told herself. She was just trying to survive. And Quinn would ask – before banishing her – the reason for her refusal. He would know it was about Ryder even if she said otherwise. She couldn't let herself believe he suspected nothing.

"We can't see each other anymore, Ryder," she said, her voice exquisitely gentle. "I…I couldn't stand if you got hurt because of me. It would break me."

"And what about you?" he countered, though his voice wasn't as rough as it had been earlier.

She swallowed hard, knowing he wouldn't like what came next.

"Quinn will be good to me. You know he will."

"And the two of you will…" he couldn't finish. Jade closed her eyes, because she knew what he was thinking. "Have you already…?"

"No," she said instantly, her eyes flashing open. But then she hesitated. "Not yet," she corrected herself. "But probably soon. Tonight maybe."

Ryder kept himself in check just barely when he saw how she flinched.

"Will you come to me afterwards?" he asked.

" _Ryder_." Her eyes widened.

"He won't expect you to stay the whole night. He didn't with Beatrix, not at first."

"You'd really want to… After I've… With your father?" She was bewildered. She knew he loved her, but after his father had touched her so intimately…? She had imagined he'd be too disgusted to even have her near him. At least that same night.

"We don't have to…do anything." He soothingly ran his hands up and down her arms, as if _she_ was the one who would be opposed. "I just…" he sighed. "I just want to be with you."

She closed her eyes and pressed her forehead to his cheek, relaxing into his embrace.

"Alright, Ryder." She sighed softly. "When it's over, if he lets me go, I will come to you."

It wasn't enough by a long stretch, but at least he still had some part of her. His father couldn't satisfy her, and she would never love him. If Ryder worked hard enough, maybe he could convince her to stay with him in secret. She was the only thing that kept him sane under the roof of a tyrant who treated his son as if he was nothing, would amount to nothing, and that there was no pretending otherwise.

He couldn't lose her. If he lost Jade, he lost everything.


End file.
